On this inaugural episode of 5x5, our intrepid leader Luke matches wits with the devilishly handsome hosts of Continue? to point out the absolute worst candidates for stepfathers video games have to offer. Whether it's the devious nature of BioShock Infinite's protagonist or the aloofness of the King of All Cosmos, you better believe you don't want your mom marrying any of these potential suitors. Not that she could... because none of these guys are real. Unless your mom can't separate fiction from reality. Then you have a whole host of other problems on your hand.

Arcade Sushi and Continue? team to bring you 5x5, a weekly list show that tackles the issues no one else will talk about. Which gaming characters have the best mustaches? What five characters should be expelled from Super Smash Bros. forever? These guys will let you know, and they'll let each other know how wrong they all are.

Have an idea for a 5x5 you really want to see? Email Staff(at)ArcadeSushi(dot)com, and maybe we'll use your submission in a future episode.

Written by Luke Brown, Paul Ritchey, Josh Henderson, Nick Murphy and Mike Sadorf
Shot and Edited by Make Film Do Good

Check out more Continue? on YouTube.

More From Arcade Sushi