Square Enix’s Kingdom Hearts II.8 Name Explanation Makes No Sense

Square Enix director Tetsuya Nomura's explanation of Kingdom Hearts II.8's title makes about as much sense as the series' overall story.

In an interview with Famitsu (courtesy of Kotaku), we finally have an explanation as to the bizarre nomenclature behind the recently announced Kingdom Hearts II.8. Unfortunately, it doesn't make that much sense. Kingdom Hearts II.8 is collection of spin-offs that will include an HD remaster of Kingdom Hearts 3D: Dream Drop Distance (a former 3DS exclusive), Kingdom Hearts: χ Back Cover and Kingdom Hearts 0.2 Birth by Sleep: A Fragmentary Passage (a mini-sequel to Birth By Sleep starring Aqua).

On their own, these names already sound ridiculous, so of course you'd need an even more absurd-sounding title to label the set. Don't forget, this is the same company known for names like Kingdom Hearts HD 1.5/2.5 ReMIX, Final Fantasy XV: Episode Duscae and Final Fantasy Type-0 HD (you can't forget the facepalm-inducing naming system of the Fabula Nova Crystallis arc of the Final Fantasy series).

Get ready, because Nomura's explanation makes some weird assumptions about the series' already bizarre naming system:

"This Kingdom Hearts Dream Drop Distance compilation follows the previously HD work 2.5...and is worthy as taking its place as 2.6," said Nomura. "Because Kingdom Hearts Birth By Sleep is 0.1, this is how the 0.2 came to be put in the latest Kingdom Hearts 0.2 Birth by Sleep."

I didn't know you were supposed to number the PSP prequel (Birth By Sleep) as Kingdom Hearts .01 (does this mean Kingdom Hearts: Chain of Memories should be called Kingdom Hearts 1.1?), but let's just keep going.

“Thus, the 2.8 number appears from 2.6 plus 0 plus 0.2.”

For some reason, Kingdom Hearts: χ Back Cover counts as 0, because it apparently doesn't have Sora in it. Well, 358/2 Days didn't have him in there, and Birth By Sleep only had him in there as a child. You know what, forget it. I'm not going to try and rationalize this anymore. This is the same company that made up that ridiculous Fal'Cie and L'Cie jargon a few years ago. I'm done trying to make sense of Square Enix's naming systems.

I would've been fine with Kingdom Hearts: Dream χ Sleep or Kingdom Hearts: Something of Something, but no. I can understand being vague with words like "light," "darkness," "hearts," and other generic terms in the series' dialogue that are actually fundamental to the games' story yet never fully explained, but this takes the cake.

Kingdom Hearts II.8 will launch for PlayStation 4 in 2016. I'm not even going to ask why they decided to add a decimal to a Roman numeral.

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